Parents Need Training Too!

Being eight months pregnant in tents is hard.

But, having a small tribe of other people to assist is very helpful. :)

As you know, Sukkot is going on right now. We're camping with my husband's family in their side pasture. Boy, am I glad we didn't go to a national park...because with the government shut-down, we probably would have been asked to leave.

Praise Yahuah...seriously.

This will be my second pregnant Sukkot. The time before last I as pregnant with my firstborn son. Now I'm pregnant with my second child and let me just say, it's easier to take care of them when they are in your belly!

It's been a great learning experience though. I've had my own training on child training, thanks to my wonderful, dearly beloved mother in law. I feel really sorry for those who aren't on good/wonderful terms with their mother-in-laws...women really miss out on having an amazing friend/mentor. But then again, mine is really a cut above the rest. ^_^

I wasn't raised like my husband. He comes from a Scriptually-structured family. Mealtimes, loving discipline, mutual respect, firm hands and soft voices. When I married him, I realized that this lifestyle, which I craved, would become my own and I would have to learn to mirror it.

Bad habits are hard to break.

Parents Need Training Too:

I have a tendency to let things go instead of addressing it immediately. Inconsistency is the enemy of order in the home. So, when my toddler, whom I have been training since he was six months, disobeys me over something, I turn the other way more often than I'd like to say.

A lot of times, I am scared to spank because I am afraid of spanking for the wrong thing.

So, here are a few guidelines I have learned while here at Sukkot, under my family's tutelage.

1. Discipline is for rebellion only.

2. Never discipline when angry or frustrated.

3. Do no harm.

4. Only use the Scriptural rod. (Hands are for loving. Never use belts or other "spanking" implements. Stop and get the rod.)

5. Never threaten. (Or count to three or wait until you've given a direction multiple times to discipline. Give the direction and if they do not obey immediately, that is rebellion.) 

6.  Love. Love. Love. (Discipline isn't about beating them into submission. Its about getting their attention in a way that they understand to put weight behind you words. After the conflict has been resolved, set them in your lap and give lots of hugs and loving. Let them know that you love them very much and that you are happy that they obeyed you. The experience needs to be POSITIVE. You both need to come away from the situation in peace, love, and mutual respect.)

 7. Redirect Whining. (Whining is not rebellion and does not need discipline. He needs to be taught in words he can understand how to say things the right way. Today, my toddler just woke up from a nap. He was falling apart all over the place and was whining about everything. My mother-in-law showed me how to redirect. She scooped him up happily and took him onto the front porch to show him some baby chicks and a frog named "Fern". Her happy attitude, change of scenery, and telling him 'Nothing is wrong. You're just fine. Let's go see the animals" showed him that everything WAS fine.)

8. Apologize When You're Wrong. (This is a key part of having respect for your children. They have just as much right to receive an apology for wrong doing as you do. If you have lost your temper or misunderstood an action, say, "Son, I'm very sorry for raising my voice at you. That was wrong of me. Please forgive me.")

These are ALL things that I truly never knew, my entire life. And most people don't!

Consistancy is key. When you stay on top of a toddler's discipline, the problems parents are having with their children at ages 3 - 5 have been stopped at age two! I'm correcting a lot of things that I've let go, bad habits I've allowed to form.

I've been at this for three days now, staying on top of things instead of letting them go. I've learned a lot. Sukkot lasts four more days...I will post an update before I go home *to no internet lol* on how things are progressing!

Remember: as a mother, it is your job to train up your child. This does not mean getting out the handy belt or kitchen spoon once you're 'fed up' with them for 'being brats'. 

Your children turn out the way you train them. 

Baruch habba b'shem Yahuah and Happy Sukkot!